A few years ago I read a book by Angela Thomas, titled “Do you think I’m beautiful?” and it touched me in a powerful way. It touched me so much that I’ve thought many times I should read it again, however I loaned the book to someone I felt could benefit from it. The person turned out to not “be a friend” and I never got the book back, but I am so hopeful it touched her in some way and that she knew I was sincere in offering it to her.
On the surface, the title of the book may sound superficial but it goes much deeper than outward beauty. In the beginning of the book, Angela relates how she grew up feeling like the ugly duckling. I can’t say I could really relate to that part but found myself elsewhere as she addressed the feeling of ugliness that results from hurts and scars, building up walls, failures and disappointments.
This weekend I watched a beauty pageant and watched a beautiful young woman compete yet each time she came on stage I could tell she was lacking in one area – self confidence. I was so burdened for her to see her obvious outward beauty have any shadow cast on it by a lack of self confidence. Another mother and I both remarked that she needed a huge boost of self confidence.
I’ve had the opportunity to exchange emails with her since that time and hopefully encourage her. The irony here is that, me, a person who sees only a mess in the mirror, could possibly hope to encourage someone else. But isn’t that what we are called to do? 1 Thessalonians 5:11 “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up….” Honestly, lately I’ve felt more torn down than built up and quite frankly, just a MESS. I’m so thankful for the encouragers in my life, particularly for the ones who aren’t blood related <wink, wink>.
People often remark on how much my two youngest daughters look like me. All of my girls are precious girls with true outward beauty. Even though I’m not thin, I don’t think I’m to the point of ugly but there are so many times when I feel like such a failure and just a complete mess.....
- a mess at being a mother and praying earnestly I don’t screw up raising these three beautiful girls.
- a mess at being a wife and thankful for the man God gave me.
- a mess at being a daughter and thankful for loving parents.
- a mess at being a daughter-in-law and thankful for at least one set of in-laws who love me in spite of my shortcomings.
- a mess at being a friend because I’m so busy piecing myself together that I can’t focus on relationships.
- a mess at being a Christian when I allow my heart to be penetrated by things other than He alone who should hold my heart and mind.
We may not always win the pageant, we may not always win the approval of others, we may not always do what’s right and we may make an utter mess of things. We will disappoint, we will have disappointments, we will fail others and we will fail ourselves. We may never completely like what WE see in the mirror. I’m thankful for the people who love me in spite of my mess. Moreover, I’m thankful for a God of restoration and forgiveness. Isaiah 61:1 and 3 “…….He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted”, “To give them beauty for ashes….”
On page 18’s of Angela Thomas’ book, she writes
“Have you ever heard your heart cry “Do you think I’m beautiful?” Then let these words embrace you with their truth:
“The King is enthralled by your beauty” Psalm 45:11
The God who slung the stars across the heavens….the same One who shaped the mountains and valleys with the palm of His hand….the God whose very breath gives life….that God, the King, has always been taken with you.
I pray anyone reading will remember those words the next time you’re a mess, the next time life is too rough, the next time someone crushes you or dashes your hope, the next time you’re on stage or facing your giants – “the King has always been taken with you.”
